WE SEEK REFUGE from thoughts which keep us awake at night. Fears and worries that are difficult to repress or the excitement of an upcoming day. Each of these canvases visually represents my refuge. Each one serves as a security blanket or a fort made from blankets and chairs. As I age, our escapes become more complex; often more hidden within personal addictions, anxieties or unachievable expectations of ourselves and others. We desperately seek refuge to suppress struggles while relishing celebrations. Ultimately, each encounter and memory shapes our own personalities and emerges as patterns slowly appearing within our aging bodies as scars and wrinkles as a visual record of our past, just as smile lines document times of happiness.
As I unravel these emotions within my canvas, I commemorate, celebrate, and grieve so that I can move forward. The process of painting has become my means to visually communicate with authenticity and ambiguity about personal topics and experiences without fear of judgment or awkwardness from oversharing– be it happy, sad, or a humble brag. The complex thoughts that occur within my paintings are my own, but the viewer is encouraged to participate in the narrative as they make connections to the emotions or burdens they carry.
Because eventually, as each canvas becomes a public narrative within which my feelings, insecurities, celebrations and healing are on display for public consumption. With my narrative being interpretive and dependent upon the individual translations of the viewer, the canvas provides collaboration within ambiguity; my safe space. Each painting presents connection and acceptance as the viewer is allowed to reflect on their own memories. Perhaps within these marks and colors an understanding occurs as emotions and memories become faintly familiar. Should we find unity within our humanity or forgiveness and understanding within our experiences?
THE PROCESS within individual brushstroke is a cathartic flow of unfiltered spontaneous thoughts. Each stroke intuitively defines the next. Marks are created and erased, exposed and covered within an honest and raw, uncensored process and acts a response to the brushstroke which preceded it. Brush strokes, scrapes, drips, and splatters might represent love, healing, frustration, forgiveness, loss and strength in an intuitively expressionist process. Within the conglomeration of color, marks, and transparency, my voice emerges.